Health & Wellness Relationships

Give Yourself a Break! Wonder Woman doesn’t exist in the real world

May 22, 2015

Wonder woman doesn't existI was pondering what to write about this week when I came across a book in my office “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Women” by Kristine Carlson.  I had been given this book a couple of years ago and had just flicked through it at the time because I was busy trying to be Wonder Woman!

Oh yes we are all wonderful, fabulous women but alas ‘shock, horror’ we aren’t Wonder Woman (which I’m actually kind of glad of as I’m not sure me in a Wonder Woman outfit would be a good look :)).  As Kristine says in her book “We are expected to do it all – all the time……We are “super women” with much to celebrate – yet we are exhausted.”

Does this sound familiar?  I can see you all nodding as you read this.

The reality is that we have succumbed to an unrealistic stereotype of what a modern woman is meant to be.  We feel we need to be juggling career, family and life in general as well as producing “Masterchef” standard dinners all while looking like a super model.

In fact, we are our own worst enemies.  We place unrealistic pressures and high expectations upon ourselves because we think that is the way it is.  Well let’s all have a reality check and realize that we are all doing okay.

As long as you are doing your best that is all that can be asked of you.  [bctt tweet=”Don’t miss out on life because you are too busy striving for perfection which doesn’t exist.”]

‘Okay Smarty’ You say ‘What is the answer?’

Here are some things you can try to make life a little less stressful.

trying to juggle everything

1.  Stop trying to be everything to everyone

I can hear my family saying “listen to yourself” as I am so guilty of this even now.  However, as I am growing older and hopefully wiser I am trying to be selective and thinking twice before I agree to do something (especially if I know that in saying ‘Yes’ it will be adding unnecessary stress to my life).  I’m not always successful but at least I’m improving.  If you are a working mother it is so hard to be ‘on’ all the time.  You need to look at what is important to you and your family first.

In my previous blog “Why We Need to Be Selfish Sometimes” I highlighted the point that sometimes you just have to say ‘No’.

2.  Set boundaries

You need to recognize your limits.  No, I’m not saying you should limit yourself however I am saying that there is only so much one person can do.  If you want to enjoy a quality of life with family and friends then you need to set boundaries as to what you can and can’t do.

If you are working full time you can’t be a houseperson full time.  You need to discuss with your partner how to divide the housekeeping duties so that you both can enjoy your leisure time together.

If you have children, give them small jobs to do when they are old enough.  They need to realize that they need to contribute to the family as well and by doing their part the family can enjoy more quality time together.  It also teaches them responsibility and pride in their work.

Hire a house cleaner if you can afford it.

Realise how much time you have and don’t over commit yourself.  Try to get to the school concert or sports day but DON’T PROMISE if you can’t.  The children will live and realise that they can’t always have what they want.

Prioritise what is important to you and your family and if you can fit anything else in that is a bonus not a given.

3.  Get a System in Place

If you know you have a rush every morning try to organize things the night before whenever possible.  Think about what you can do to slow down the morning rush so that you aren’t starting the day frazzled.

Try preparing meals ahead of time and freeze them so you can have an evening off preparing a meal when you have had a hectic day.

Create a Planner and enter everything you need to do.  This should also include family time, ‘Me” time, Partner time, social time as well as school reminders etc.  We have 168 hours in a week so take sleep time out and there is still time to do everything if you are organized.  Seeing entries on a planner can help you organize yourself and also avoid over committing.

4.  Accept You Aren’t Perfect

This is very hard however you are the only one really putting this pressure on yourself.  Your partner and family love you for who you are.  They don’t expect perfection because they know they aren’t perfect either.  Learn to accept and ask for help.  Don’t be so fussy if your partner isn’t folding the clothes the way you would like – at least they are helping.

Don’t worry if ‘little Johnny or Jill’ at school have a far better Easter Hat in the parade than what you made for your child. (Ask my daughter or son about my attempts!). [bctt tweet=”It is more important that your children know you love them and you give them QUALITY time.”]

Once you take the pressure of yourself and realize that although you aren’t Wonder Woman you are a special human being you will enjoy life more.

Now put away that ridiculous Wonder Woman costume and RELAX!

 

Let’s Sizzle!

 

 

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46 Comments

  • Reply Joanne T Ferguson May 24, 2015 at 13:16

    Great article that serves as a reminder to all! Pinned and shared!
    #ibabloggers

    • Reply sue May 24, 2015 at 13:37

      Thanks Joanne. I think maybe you are Wonder Woman with all that you do but for most of us I think this post is timely. Thanks for sharing and commenting.

  • Reply Toni Pike May 27, 2015 at 12:16

    Great article – and something we should all remember!

    • Reply sue May 27, 2015 at 12:49

      Thanks Toni! Yes it isn’t always easy to remember I’m trying hard to follow my own advice! Thanks for the comment.

  • Reply Savvy Sandwicher May 27, 2015 at 12:36

    Great advice! I’m accepting that I’m a work in progress and perfection leads to burnout which I don’t want.

    • Reply sue May 27, 2015 at 12:49

      Hello and thanks for the comment! It is hard not to try to do it all but you are so right about burnout. If we get that far we just have to stop!

  • Reply Leanne@crestingthehill May 27, 2015 at 16:08

    Hi Sue – always good to be reminded that we don’t have to do it all or be all things to all people. It’s nice to take the pressure off.

    • Reply sue May 27, 2015 at 16:12

      Hi Leanne it is hard to do but we have to realize that we can’t be everything to everyone. Have a lovely day and don’t forget to Sizzle!

  • Reply Debbie Rodrigues May 27, 2015 at 17:15

    I have fought to be Wonder Woman my entire 40 years. The time has arrived to stop. My body asked me for that. Not only I cannot deliver like before, I don’t want to. I am choosing my battles wisely now.
    Great post Sue!

    • Reply sue May 28, 2015 at 05:20

      Hi Debbie, yes I know what you mean. It isn’t good that your body had to step in and tell you to stop but perhaps you are just being more selective now. I’m trying to be although a life time of habit is hard to break. Thanks for your comments.

  • Reply Lianne May 28, 2015 at 18:14

    Thats all so so true!
    I find it a lot more difficult to remember all that since having my 2nd baby and starting work from home.
    Fab article, def made me think!!

    • Reply sue May 29, 2015 at 10:16

      Thank you for your positive comments Lianne! It is even harder after baby no. 2 comes along but you need to nurture yourself so you will be in top form for your family. Have a great weekend.

  • Reply Janelle @ Run With No Regrets May 29, 2015 at 05:27

    I love this post! It is so true that women are supposed to “have it all” and be able to “do it all”…and it’s a lot of pressure! I have to learn to divide my time better and not overcommit myself. Such great tips that are important to remember once in awhile!

    • Reply sue May 29, 2015 at 10:17

      Thanks for your comment Janelle and I’m glad you agree. It’s hard to do it but if we try to accept we can’t do it all then we are halfway there.

  • Reply tamzen temple May 29, 2015 at 14:13

    I think you learn all these lessons with age…. Dammit!! Oh if only you knew all these younger you would or could be a Wonderwoman. 🙂

    • Reply sue May 29, 2015 at 15:22

      I know because you might be right we may have become Wonderwoman! Thanks for your comment and we can only but try 🙂

  • Reply Janine May 29, 2015 at 20:03

    I so hear you! I’ve written a post on the same subject – a few years ago now. Of course, I still have my moments where I slip the costume on because I forget I’m NOT wonder woman!

    • Reply sue May 30, 2015 at 09:49

      Hi Janine yes it I a common subject but one that is important. I know what you mean – I still have my costume as well! Thanks for the comment and I hope you enjoyed the post.

  • Reply Kathleen May 29, 2015 at 21:11

    Awesome post Sue, you speak for us all. I like the what Debbie said about choosing our battles wisely.
    Thanks, Kathleen

    • Reply sue May 30, 2015 at 09:49

      Hello Kathleen I’m glad you like the post and I’m sure most women would agree. Thank you for taking the time to comment and I hope you enjoyed reading it.

  • Reply JcCee May 30, 2015 at 04:17

    Great post! I have dealt with this so many times in the past especially number 1. Now, I give myself a break and understand that I am a work in progress and I am OK with that. Pinning this. Visiting from Fridays Blog Booster Party #8

    • Reply sue May 30, 2015 at 09:52

      Oh I love that phrase ‘work in progress’ and good on you for giving yourself a break. have a lovely weekend and thanks for visiting.

  • Reply Lisa Kniebe May 30, 2015 at 19:48

    I haven’t given up on the idea of being Wonder Woman yet, I just can’t fit in the costume at the moment! #FridayReflections

    • Reply sue May 31, 2015 at 06:35

      Good for you! Just remember we don’t always need to wear it! Have a great weekend.

  • Reply Beth May 31, 2015 at 08:00

    This is a great post. We all have to accept that no one is perfect. All we can do is try our best, right?

    Thanks for linking up to #justanotherlinky Hope too see you again Sunday!

    • Reply sue May 31, 2015 at 18:29

      Exactly, we just forget sometimes and put too much pressure on ourselves when we are already doing a great job. Thanks for the opportunity to link up and will be back Sunday!

  • Reply Mackenzie Glanville (reflectionsfromme.com) May 31, 2015 at 09:37

    It is hard, we put so much pressure on ourselves don’t we? I keep trying to tell myself that I don’t have to be wonder woman, but at times I slip up and try to do it all, especially with the children. Great advice honey xx Thanks for linking up with Friday Reflections

    • Reply sue May 31, 2015 at 18:30

      Thanks Mackenzie! Great being part of the link up. We all slip up at times but as long as we can relax and give ourselves a pat on the back all will be well.

    • Reply sue June 2, 2015 at 10:31

      Thanks for the lovely comments Gina and yes it is hard to do but putting yourself first on occasions is good for us. Have a lovely day and see you again!

  • Reply Amy June 4, 2015 at 08:12

    Great list! I think the most important one for me is setting boundaries. Sometimes you don’t even realize what you are putting on your plate until it’s completely overflowing! Thanks for sharing! #ConfessionsLinkUp

    • Reply sue June 4, 2015 at 09:48

      I know what you mean! I have really been trying since I wrote this post to set boundaries but sometimes it is hard to say no. The blog nearly took over our life and I now realize I have to just try to schedule my time and stick to that. Thanks for the comment and have a lovely day!

  • Reply Barb @ A Life in Balance June 5, 2015 at 04:04

    Great reminder! I’m glad I saw this when looking for posts to share from the Motivation Monday party today.

    I would also add that moms need to delegate. Dads want to help; sometimes all they need is a specific task.

    Thanks for linking up!

    • Reply sue June 5, 2015 at 12:40

      thanks Barb I’m glad you saw it too! Have a great weekend

  • Reply Corinne June 6, 2015 at 04:00

    I couldn’t agree with you more! In fact, this philosophy is the basis of my blog. As women, we need to give ourselves a break from the expectation that we can do everything perfectly all the time. Thanks for linking this up at This Is How We Roll Thursday!

    • Reply sue June 6, 2015 at 09:22

      Hi Corinne thanks for the feedback! I need to follow your page I think. The more we spread the word that it is okay to be kinder to ourselves the better! have a great weekend!

  • Reply Wake Up Wednesday #72 | Far From Normal June 10, 2015 at 10:02

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  • Reply Wake Up Wednesday #72 | Epic Mommy Adventures June 10, 2015 at 11:02

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  • Reply Debbie Rodrigues June 10, 2015 at 16:53

    I really love this post of yours, Sue!
    Thank you for adding it to #WednesdaysWisdom!

  • Reply Danielle June 13, 2015 at 00:20

    Great tips! As a mom, I always find myself trying to go above and beyond, never leaving any time for myself. It’s exhausting. Awesome advice that I’ll have to use in the future. Stopping by from Feature Friday’s Linkup 🙂

    • Reply sue June 13, 2015 at 11:15

      Thanks Danielle! Don’t forget to have some Me Time, the family won’t suffer instead they will benefit from a relaxed Mum! Thanks for stopping by to comment.

  • Reply Amanda Long September 11, 2015 at 10:36

    I absolutely love this post and needed to hear it, being tomorrow is Friday and I’m feeling like I did NOTHING this week… Honestly, we women are too hard on ourselves. I did do a lot just not everything is “perfect” We all need to hear this at least once a month 🙂 I will be featuring this post in #LFEO tomorrow. Thanks for linking up with us 🙂

    • Reply sue September 11, 2015 at 14:23

      Oh I’m so glad you enjoyed the post Amanda and very happy that you are featuring it. It has taken me a very long time to realise we aren’t Wonder Women so I want to pass my experience and wisdom on to others so they take the pressure off themselves. Enjoy your weekend 🙂

  • Reply Learning From Each Other Blog Party #7 - Amanda Unfolded September 28, 2015 at 11:00

    […] Amanda’s Pick: Give Yourself a Break! Wonder Woman doesn’t exist in the real world from Sizzling Toward Sixty “I needed to hear what this post says, being today is Friday and I’m feeling like I did […]

    • Reply sue September 28, 2015 at 13:06

      Thanks for the feature Amanda!

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