Interviews & Guest Posts Over 50s Lifestyle

My Life as a Mother Wolf

June 21, 2016
mother wolf

This week in my Midlife Matters series I would love to introduce you to Leanne Le Cras from Cresting the Hill.  Leanne and I met through blogging and have probably been sisters in another life I think!

We both started our blogs roughly around the same time, we both blog about midlife and it’s crazy, wonderful adventure, we are both Aussies although we live on the opposite side of Australia from each other and most importantly we are ABBA fans!

I love Leanne’s writing and am a fan (can you guess? LOL:)!  She is warm hearted and shares her experience of midlife in a special way with all of her readers.  A devoted wife and mother and now a proud Nan, Leanne writes about how at midlife she is coming into her own as a person and individual in her own right.

You can read more about Leanne at the end of the post and also find her website and social media links.

Copy of www.sizzlingtowardssixty.com.au(27)

Leanne writes about Motherhood and also her new role as a Nan……

My children have always mocked me for being a Mother Wolf. They tell anyone who will listen that I raised them and then kicked them out of the den to fend for themselves in the big, wide world (no mention of their wolf father though!) As much as it pains me to admit it, I think the Mother Wolf label isn’t far off the mark.

CHILDHOOD

playing on the tyre

As parents we did our utmost to raise children who could fend for themselves and not rely on us all the time. We lived on a two acre rural block about 20 minutes outside Bunbury in the southwest of Western Australia.

It was close enough to commute, but far enough to keep our children out of harm’s way as they grew up.

We never had to worry about where they were or who they were seeing because they needed us to transport them any further than their neighbourhood friends’ houses.

They rode bikes, built cubbies, lit fires (not approved of by their mother!), played sport, went to youth group, had lots of friends and cousins to hang out with, and generally had a pretty good childhood.

I was looking back through some photo albums the other day and there are so many happy snaps of our kids out in the fresh air having a good time – not stuck inside on computers or glued to the TV. I’m very grateful the internet was a thing of the future and they could grow up without its influence.

 

UNIVERSITY

Both our son and daughter left home in their late teens to live in the city and attend university. Some parents find this transition heart wrenching, but as country dwellers we knew the time would come when our kids would want to move to the big smoke and university was the starting point.

By the time they left home, they both knew how to cook and clean, they had driver’s licences and their own cars (paid for by themselves from their part-time jobs). They had both worked for a year or so after high school so they had some savings and qualified for government assistance while they lived away from home. We were so proud to see them eager to leave and not clinging to our apron strings (or us clinging to them).

Fast forward a few years and university was finished. Our son went on to do his PhD while he worked part-time at the uni he had studied at. Our daughter went straight into a teaching position at a private college near her home.

While they were at uni they had both share-housed with other students and fended for themselves admirably – they never felt the need to sponge off their parents (which was fortunate because there wasn’t a lot of spare money floating around), and they came home to visit occasionally in their uni breaks.

 

MARRIAGE

the kids

Towards the end of their studies life took another turn and they both met their future spouses. Long term courtships are not a strong point in our family – it seems like we meet “the one” and before we know it we’re married.

My husband and I married within a year of meeting each other, our son met his wife in July and married her in the following September, and our daughter met her husband in February and they married in December that year.

We became in-laws twice within 18 months and couldn’t be happier for our children especially as we watched them save for and then buy their first homes – taking on mortgages and being all ‘grown up’.

 

BABIES

nan and papaThis year (four and a half years after their wedding) our son and daughter-in-law presented us with our first grandbaby, a little girl named Sophia May. She was the icing on the cake for her parents and for us too.

To see your children become parents and to be allowed to be part of that widening circle of family is such a lovely experience. I’ve spent a lot of time with babies over the last decade or so – volunteering with Red Cross Family Support and also with the babies of young couples in our church, but NOTHING beats having a grandbaby – a little person who is yours but not yours – who you can hold and then give back.

To see your children become parents to be part of that widening circle of family is such a lovely experience.Click To Tweet

I can’t wait to watch her grow up and to meet her future siblings – and cousins when it’s our daughter’s turn.

I’m doing my very best to not interfere in my children’s lives – you have to respect their boundaries to stop treading on each other’s toes. You have to respect their decisions and let them make their own mistakes.

They do things differently to how we might choose to do it, but it’s only different – not wrong. They have steady jobs, lovely homes, they remember Mothers Day and come home for Christmas.

I might wish we could see them more often, but they value their space and so do we. Distance means you can’t drop in for a 5 minute chat, but it also gives us the opportunity for longer visits when they happen and appreciating those times more because they are less frequent.

I saw the term “Detachment Parenting” a while ago – it’s the opposite to helicopter ‘Attachment Parenting” and I think it describes my mother wolf style.

When I complain that our son hasn’t phoned lately, or our daughter hasn’t visited for a while, my husband reminds me that our aim in life was to ensure our children grew up into self-sufficient, independent adults and we succeeded admirably…..but I’d still like to live closer sometimes – especially with that new delicious grandbaby on the scene. Looks like our visits to the city will be increasing this year!

Meet Leanne

Leanne Le CrasLeanne started Cresting the Hill at the end of 2014 to find her voice again and has enjoyed connecting with other women who are celebrating midlife.  She previously defined her life by saying she was a wife, or a mother or by her profession.  These days she defines herself as a woman in her own right, and on her midlife journey has discovered who she is and that she actually likes the person she has become. Leanne loves to share tips on how to find the sunshine in life plus stories from her life and family.  Leanne would love to connect with you and share her journey ‘cresting the hill’.

Follow Leanne

Blog:                      http://www.crestingthehill.com.au

Facebook:             https://www.facebook.com/crestingthehill

Pinterest:              https://au.pinterest.com/leannelecras

bloglovin:              https://www.bloglovin.com/blogs/cresting-hill-14435377

SU:                         http://www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/leannelc

G+:                        https://plus.google.com/u/0/118294533773036289317/posts

 

 

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23 Comments

  • Reply Leanne June 21, 2016 at 14:33

    Hi Sue – thanks so much for including me in your guest postings – I love your blog and it’s such a pleasure to be a part of it! Hopefully some of your readers will be able to relate to a mum who didn’t suffer greatly from Empty Nest Syndrome xx

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 21, 2016 at 15:10

      My pleasure Leanne. I admire your work and your posts inspire many other women to enjoy their midlife. I’m sure there will be many who can relate to the ‘Empty Nest Syndrome’. x

  • Reply Toni Pike June 21, 2016 at 14:39

    Loved your article Leanne and great to hear about other families. My own is at a similar stage. It’s wonderful to see our children grown up and independent – but sometimes feel a bit neglected. My two children are 7 and 12 hours drive away, so a major exercise to see them. Like you, I believe in “detachment parenting” and don’t ever want to be a burden.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 21, 2016 at 15:11

      Leanne certainly has a lovely writing style Toni and I’m pleased you could relate to her post. She has recently had a granddaughter and you will be next!!!

    • Reply Leanne June 23, 2016 at 11:29

      Hi Toni – it’s tough when they don’t live nearby isn’t it? I envy my friends who have family get togethers every week, but at the same time I am so proud that mine are doing well and not hanging off out apron strings x

  • Reply Shirley Corder June 22, 2016 at 18:06

    Leanne, I loved your post. Thanks for sharing. (Mother of three with six beautiful grandchildren aged 22-2!

    • Reply Leanne June 23, 2016 at 11:30

      Thanks so much Shirley – SIX grandchildren! I am so envious!! I’m hoping I’ll end up with a few more down the track but am happy to have one for now 🙂

  • Reply Carol Cassara June 23, 2016 at 01:40

    I love your common sense approach to parenting, and of course, your husband’s. I never had kids, so this is all interesting to me.

    • Reply Leanne June 23, 2016 at 11:32

      I’m not sure we’re textbook parenting models Carol, but we seem to have done something right and I love the fact that our kids have done so well and become such great human beings.

  • Reply Lois Alter Mark June 23, 2016 at 13:46

    Oh, I loved learning more about Leanne, another of my favorite Aussies! I totally relate to the mother wolf — I’m a big-time mama bear!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 24, 2016 at 11:26

      Yes Lois, Leanne is great. We are good blogging friends both Aussies but on opposite side of the continent. Glad you could relate to her post.

  • Reply Cathy Chester June 23, 2016 at 19:32

    I already admired Leanne but now I’m glad to get to know her even more. She is so smart are parenting and grandparenting, something that is not always easy as our children get older and leave the next. What a lovely blog post!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 24, 2016 at 11:27

      So pleased you enjoyed Leanne’s post Cathy and I’m honoured to have had her as part of the midlife series. Have a great day!

  • Reply Sheryl Kraft June 23, 2016 at 22:48

    What a lovely story. So nice to see so many happy families!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 24, 2016 at 11:27

      Thanks Sheryl! Pleased you enjoyed meeting Leanne.

  • Reply Silly Mummy June 25, 2016 at 08:32

    Lovely to hear more about Leanne! None of our kids’ grandparents live near by, so they feel the same about wishing they could see them more often!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 25, 2016 at 09:33

      I’ve loved this series as I get to introduce women of midlife and their experiences. My children had lost their grandparents by they time my eldest was 5. I love spending time with my grandson who is 2 and fortunately lives nearby. It is hard when you don’t live close but as they get older there is skype!

  • Reply Kathleen - Bloggers Lifestyle June 26, 2016 at 22:06

    Mother Wolf, that was such a neat story of your family. Sounds like as parents you have done an admirable job. It is very satisfying to see your children independent and forming their own homes and families.
    Thanks for sharing this part of your life with us.

    Kathleen
    Bloggers Pit Stop

    • Reply Sue Loncaric July 1, 2016 at 10:48

      It was a great story Kathleen wasn’t it?

  • Reply Nikki June 28, 2016 at 13:08

    Congratulations on the new baby! Now it’s time for you to spoil the little one. How fun!

  • Reply Wendy June 30, 2016 at 10:51

    That little baby’s face, oh my goodness! “Delicious” was a perfect word you used! 🙂 I like your “Mother Wolf” analogy, too. It is really amazing to watch your kids grow into adults. Mine is only halfway through college, but already she has proven herself independent and capable. And, to everyone’s surprise except my own, I’ve adjusted to the empty nest quite well! 🙂 It’s always a pleasure to read more about you, Leanne, and get to know you even better. Also, I always thought you and Sue lived near each other, haha!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric July 1, 2016 at 10:57

      I’m pleased you enjoyed getting to know a little more about Leanne. I suppose we are neighbours just a few 1,000miles apart LOL:)

  • Reply Celebrating Life by Creating Memories - Sizzling Towards 60 & Beyond August 17, 2017 at 01:00

    […] My Life as a Mother Wolf […]

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