Do you know what it takes to Thrive? Each week I am reminded of how Women Over 50 are full of wisdom and inspiration. My Over 50 & Thriving Guest series, continues to surprise me with new learnings from women, like myself, who are embracing this wonderful time of life.
This week’s guest is someone I met during the AtoZ Blogging Challenge back in April, so I’ve only connected to her for a short time. Deborah Weber, from Temenos of the Blessing Light, is a person who is full of love and joy. You can feel it in her writing and also in her passion to help others find love and joy in their life. Please connect with Deborah through the links at the end of her post.
In her contribution to the Thrive series, Deborah explains why we need certain qualities in our life to thrive – the T.H.R.I.V.E. Qualities.
Why you need the T.H.R.I.V.E. Qualities
I could talk about flourishing endlessly, and so I was delighted when Sue invited me to contribute to her series on thriving. It is in a sense what my work is all about, and what I see as a mission in life for all of us. Since I’m also quite fond of words and word play, I thought perhaps I’d approach this topic with an acrostic of thrive and the qualities I think are important.
Being true to who you really are seems obvious, and yet I find so many people struggle with this. They bend themselves in all manner of pretzel shapes trying to be what they believe others want them to be; what is deemed socially acceptable; how they think they should be/believe/act. With each thing we take on that’s not truly ourselves, or each thing we keep hidden, untapped or denied that truly is us, it’s as though the inner core light gets dimmed, diminished, or even goes out altogether.
I believe we are all wildly beautiful and gorgeously eccentric, and that we not only need to own that about ourselves and unwaveringly express it, but also encourage and celebrate such expression in others as well. I love very much what Rumi wished for: “I want to unfold. I don’t want to stay folded anywhere, because where I am folded, there I am a lie.”
To be heart-based means a couple of things to me. I believe loving-kindness and compassion are crucial and that the world and all its creatures are increasingly in need of being met this way. But I also believe that our hearts are our unerring compasses and that when we listen to and follow their direction we are well-guided. I love the simple practice of taking a moment, putting my hand on my heart, and taking a couple of slow deep breaths.
It brings me back into the present, centered, and fully connected once again. I often think of my heart as a lotus bowl, holding the pure spark of me, holding it safely so it can be fanned, and amplifying the light so it can radiate widely. I want to be part of a world where we all feel free to shine our hearts. After all, as Ram Dass so beautifully reminds us: “We’re all just walking each other home.”
On the surface reciprocity certainly has to do with giving and receiving, but for me it holds a lot of teaching about balance. If we give too much, or take too much, we are out of balance and our lives show it. Thousands of times a day we have access to a simple and profound reminder – breathing. Inhalation – exhalation – the moment between. Breathing in and receiving; briefly holding that breath and having; and then releasing and giving.
For me that’s exactly what Reciprocity is about: receiving-having-giving. We live in a society which strives to make everything straight-forwardly transactional, urging us to keep track and demand tit-for-tat interactions. I think this is unfortunate and a senseless limitation that misses the expansiveness of what is truly going on.
There is a gift in knowing that as you touch something, you are touched. I think Mary Oliver speaks perfectly about reciprocity – “Instructions for living a life: Pay attention. Be astonished. Tell about it.”
I believe we are each powerful Luminous Beings with an unimagined capacity for love and creation. While I don’t expect everyone to share my beliefs, I see the energies of empowerment all around us. What world are we going to create? The world each one of us wants to live in exists as a potential within each and every one of us. We have to step into that knowing.
We have to step into the power of wayshowers leading the way of merging heart and mind. Of choosing love over fear. Of anchoring unity rather than more separation. I absolutely embrace my self-named role as an Ambassador of love and light. I truly believe that the world is filled with goodness and we can encourage the growth and unfolding of it.
We can nurture our hearts, we can love one another, and we can help those in need. We can be agents of positive change, of transformation, and of anchored light. Rob Brezsny offers this rallying cry, and it is one I thoroughly endorse: “We are dissident bodhisattvas rebelling against all those forces that feed fear and ignore love.”
One of the perspectives I hold is my understanding that all things are vibrational – each thing has a unique energy “signature.” We in our entirety – our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual bodies – are made up of a series of frequencies, and these frequencies form a harmonic and balanced whole when we are healthy, happy, and aligned with our highest path and purpose.
We’re always attuning to the vibrations around us, just as we’re always emitting our own vibration. When we’re conscious of ourselves as vibrational beings we can begin transforming ourselves. We can deliberately introduce those vibrations we want to align with into our own fields of energy. Shift the energy and it opens the way so that things around you can change as well.
I think it’s important we remain conscious, intentional, oriented to the well-being that is our true state, and committed to holding and radiating the highest vibrations we can in every moment, so we can add to the collective well-being of all. I am quite fond of this wisdom from Rumi: “The soul has been given its own ears to hear things the mind does not understand.”
Things are always changing; that’s a constant of life. I like to think it’s a continual invitation to grow into our wholeness. I often say I like to keep my feet on the joy trail, yet I’m no Pollyanna – I know we all have our share of challenges and wobbles, sadness and hard, both personally and collectively.
But I whole-heartedly believe we’re responsible for how we meet the world and the energy we put out there. And in this time of so much fear-mongering, separation consciousness, and service-to-self in the collective, I think it’s especially important we all do our best to contribute to making the world a kinder, gentler, more compassionate place for all beings.
With each moment, with each cycle, with each lifetime we have the opportunity to spiral into new arrangements of understanding. And I think an important question to consider always is: How am I preventing myself from living my life the way I want and creating the world I want to see? I take Maya Angelou’s admonishment to heart: “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” We are ever evolving and that’s how it should be.
So there you have it – my perspectives about thriving. I’d love to hear what you think.
Let’s Keep Sizzling!